In A Memory You'll Find Me
by afickleflakes
Summary: The Final Battle has ended, and Allen is dead and gone with the Earl. She's suffocating. She can't live without him. She needs to leave it all behind. Become someone else. But when she does, he, now an assassin, finds her again by chance.
1. Prologue: Don't Look Back

In a Memory, You'll Find Me

Shard Zero: Don't Look Back

Disclaimer: I do not own D. Gray-Man. Hoshino Katsura does. I only own the fictional town listed below.

Note:

Also, this story is set in the twenty-first, century, making it pretty much an AU fic. But there's still innocence.

The timeline for this story is after the final battle which ends differently; in Allen's death. More details to be revealed later.

* * *

She landed on a roof gingerly. She had to be fast, or someone would eventually see her hasty escape.

Her eyes were red and tired from crying, her body still trembling in mourning for him. Thoughts of the silver-haired exorcist flooded her mind. But she had to be fast, swift in her actions. She could not afford to mess this up.

The consequences of failure were too terrifying to think about.

She had already carefully set up her 'story'; the red anklets similar to those of her Dark Boots were in her room, under the pillow, and had written a suicide note expertly and left it deliberately in Lavi's room while he was out.

Her plan was running smoothly. In no time, she would escape.  
She would forget everything about this godforsaken life of death and killing, the life of an exorcist. She would forget the torture she endured for the sake of mankind.

A stray tear trickled down her cheek.

Forgetting life as an exorcist meant forgetting about her friends, didn't it? Forgetting precious moments they'd shared, previous battles, won and lost. She would forget the life of someone who's friends and co-workers were her family.

Second thoughts flooded her head.

Lenalee brushed away the tears on her cheeks and strode up to the end of the highest roof of the order. She closed her eyes.

She had to be strong.  
They hadn't talked about him after his death, hadn't reminisced of happy times with him.

It would be the same with her.

"_Innocence, activate…"_

The anklets split, blood-red substance wrapping Lenalee's legs.

No more second thoughts.

This would be the exact moment that determined everything. If she made a mistake, it would be over. She would be strapped to a bed, confined to its corners for the rest of her exorcist life.

She had told Lavi to get up and see a Lunar Eclipse at exactly 2.15AM. She had told him to look out his window, and know that Lenalee Lee, exorcist of the Black Order, hadn't actually committed suicide, but run away.

She had even asked Kanda to see her.

They were the only two who could possibly know, possibly understand her decision.

Someone needed to know. Someone would need to find her if anything happened at the order and they needed her.

Someone would need to find her if, somehow, miraculously, Allen _came back_.  
But she wouldn't pin her hopes too high.

And now, there would be _no turning back._

She heard someone call her name frantically, alarmed.

She turned to the right, catching Lavi's eye, and smiled.

"I'll be fine," she mouthed, hoping he would understand her.  
Then she raised a finger to her lips, and smiled, tears slipping from her eyes, sliding down her cheeks.

Lenalee launched herself off the rooftop, falling downwards headfirst.

The ground was rushing up to meet her, but stopped short as she flipped.  
Her Dark Boots were now in front of her, in a position to cushion her fall.

She touched the ground with her legs, silent, no heavier than a butterfly.  
Then, she zoomed upwards, wind rushing into her face.

The air was madly refreshing.

She looked back at the large building.  
London was beautiful at night. A circus of lights.

Her brother had made a good choice.

Her brother.

She shook her head, trying to stop herself from those troubling thoughts.  
She would return to her brother, eventually. She would come back for him, just as he had done for her.

Now, she needed to focus on starting a new life.

She would change her appearance. Change her name. Change her birthday.

Change her identity.

* * *

A/N: Hello all! This is the third story I'm publishing this month. It's an old piece of writing I didn't finish. I found it at random in the back of the storage files on my computer and decided to post it. Otherwise, it would go to waste.

I hope it turned out alright. ^_^


	2. Flasback

In a Memory, You'll find me

Shard One: Flashback

Disclaimer: I do not own D. Gray-Man. Hoshino Katsura does.

* * *

Allen sat down heavily in the chair, wiping the sweat off his brow. His hands were covered in blood, _her _blood.

The man in the white lab coat handed the young assassin a cup of hot chocolate which he sipped at as thoughts branched out into different sections where the possible outcomes of certain decisions he had made in the period of time he'd remembered being alive replayed again and again in his mind; the period of time of which he had stayed with Fujika, studied medicine, the whole time he'd spent trying to rebuild his lost past and replenish his memories were raked up and the raven haired assassin smiled sadly.

After helping Akira Okita with her injuries, treating the damages he had inflicted on her body, the assassin finally had the luxury of rest on the small couch in the waiting lounge of the small alley clinic and surgery centre he worked at during the day. The thought of even having helped Doctor Russell treat the girl gave him the shudders. After all, even though doctors treated all kind of patients, he was no certified doctor, nor had he treated a woman before either.

The young raven-haired assassin looked out of the window, his grey eyes staring up at the similarly coloured winter sky as snowflakes cascaded down to the ground softly. Recalling the strange, confusing and gruelling events of the previous few days, Allen lost himself in a cloud of thought. His arms shivered in the cold, a single thin blanket draped around his shoulders in the chilly room…

_The jet black machine spun out of the track at the worst time; down slope. The snow pelting down from the skies only worsened the situation. There was obviously nothing the driver could do to hinder, let alone stop, the car's descent down the snow-smothered slope. Allen smirked. This would finish it, he was sure._

_But suddenly, having smashed into a random tree at the edge of the turn, the car came to a halt, snow rapidly coating its outer surface area. Smoke plagued the pitch black winter sky as it billowed out of the flaming, totalled car at the side of the road._

_ Strands of black hair stuck to Allen's face as he wiped a little sweat off his forehead with the piece of cloth around his wrist. Scowling, he trudged down the hill, careful of where he stepped. He was sure the attack would not be fatal, even if the car had crashed, spinning at full speed, into a tree. Such impact would never kill him and he knew it. What's more, this was a race-car driver. '_He'd' _probably met with such accidents before and lived._

_As the skilful assassin neared the car of his victim, he noticed the oil spilling out of the gas tank from the bottom of the car onto the dirtied snow underneath. He wouldn't have much time to recover the body unless he wanted to be torched to ashes alive. _

_Snow crunched under his platform boots as he made his way to the wreckage. He avoided the few flames that covered parts of the road, threatening to lick him and set him on fire. When he finally got close enough to see the ruined front of the car, shattered windshield glass and the bloodied body of the victim of the horrendous accident he had set into motion moments before, flames had already begun to spread onto the long trail of oil to the gas tank. _

_He struggled a while to get the famous Leo Casanova out of the car, the race-car driver's legs a little stuck between the wrecked front of the car and the seat '_he'_ had been sitting on. Allen decided it best to cut the cushion of the seat so as not to ruin the body._

_As he set to work quickly, blood spilling over him from the wounds of the racer that was supported on his shoulders, he felt a warm breath on his cheek. Looking to his side, he caught sight of the helmet that tumbled off the head of his victim, rolling off his back and onto the white coated ground, in the nick of time to see _'his'_ face. Or more like _her_ face._

_He was awed and utterly shocked to find that Leo Casanova was actually a girl. He sawed the cushion seat even faster, in enraged and confused movements. Had Fujika actually asked him to kill a woman just because he was inferior to her when it came to racing? Had jealousy actually pushed his saviour to ask him for the favour of assassinating the poor girl?_

_When he got the girl out, he rushed off with her in his bare arms, the biting cold around them chilling his bones. The girl was wrapped tightly and warmly in his jacket, one of the vain attempts at stopping at least a little blood from spilling out of the bloody bundle and dripping onto the ground, leaving evidence of the failed assassination. It was a trail that could bring any famous assassin to ruin. _

_In terms of other factors affecting his safety, the raven-haired assassin was thankful that he had escaped because the Lamborghini Sports Edition and all the evidence in it burst into flames seconds after he left._

_Striding up to his own car, the assassin carefully laid the girl in the passenger seat next to him. _

_As he set the car into gear, the racer-girl slid to the side where his shoulder stopped her from slipping any further. He kicked his car into going at a considerable speed, pressing his right foot on the accelerator as the girl muttered unconscientiously in her state of unconsciousness. A slight blush crossed her cheeks as her body temperature suddenly increased and Allen looked down at her. _

_"_Allen-kun… I miss you…" _she whispered._

_He almost swung straight into the tree on the curb, lucky to escape despite the slippery and cold terrain, as they pulled into the drive in front of Fujika's apartment. _

_What the girl had said made him even angrier. _

_'_If she knows my name, ' _he thought as he trudged up the lawn to the porch and then a few steps more to the front door, '_it means she probably knew me before I lost my memory… Which means Fujika just asked me to assassinate someone who might have been able to tell me more about my past!'

_Allen knocked on the front door loudly, the moonlight making his hair appear silver. His thoughts wondered to more reasonable foundations. _

_'_Or she might be talking about someone else who has the same name as I do.'

_The door creaked open, revealing the older man inside who smiled at the sight of the battered girl and the assassin he had employed. _

_'_But he shouldn't have asked me to kill a woman or girl anyways!'

_Allen's brow furrowed._

_"Fujika-san."_

_"Ah, thank you Allen, for taking care of my rival-"_

_Allen cut him off mid-sentence. "What is the meaning of this?!"_

_Fujika raised an eyebrow. His expression changed again when he realised what Allen was getting at._

_"You mean you can't kill women? Or children? How are you going to be a good assassin…?" he asked in a slurred voice._

_"SHUT UP!" Allen brought his gloved left hand to Fujika's face._

_The sound of his fist colliding with the flesh and bone of Fujika's face broke the tense quiet of the night. _

_"I've made it a policy never to kill women or children…" he looked down at Fujika who cowered in fear of the being before him, "As for scum like you... There isn't a problem… But, I owe you my life so I'll spare you this time."_

_His left hand went back to supporting the girl which he instead carried tenderly on his back. He would treat her at his house and then bring her to the private hospital in town the next day._

_Turning to leave, he looked at Fujika, who still sat with a terrified expression on his face. _

_As blood rolled off the cheek of Leo Casanova, and onto his own, the assassin called to the fearful man metres away from them. _

_"Listen. If you dare hurt any woman or child ever again, or even if you order someone else to, you'd better watch your back. Because when that happens, I'll be the one sending you to your grave."_

_-_

_Yet again, Allen headed off towards a new destination. _

_Instead, he went to his house on Lavender Street, a place situated far from Fujika's, the home Allen had bought and sustained with the money he earned as an assassin. He had housed himself there while attending the local institution of medicine, the Medical Faculty of Monacco, and acting as assistant head doctor at the clinic Russell owned._

_The raven-haired assassin stared off into the snowy sunset as the sky grew dark with night and he rounded the corner, letting his mind wander as he continued along the coastal route._

_Allen decided, pretty hesitantly and with a lot of contemplation, that he would treat the girl there at his own house. Going to Russell's would be too risky for him at the moment. _

_Driving his Ferrari yet again with the famous racer-girl beside him, leaning against him from time to time at turns and spilling even more red gooey stuff all over him, the raven-haired 20-year-old headed towards his own house._

_As Allen rounded the corner, his house in sight, adjacent to the wide open sea, an explosion from behind threw his car off balance with the shockwaves it sent pulsing through the atmosphere. The blast sent the sports car swerving into a bush at the edge of the cliff._

_The impact of the car's sudden swerve sent Allen crashing into the girl as the car skidded on the snow coated ground. As the car flipped over and rolled several times, the raven haired assassin wrapped his arms around the wounded girl, shielding her from harm in his warm arms, the world around him spinning. He was rather happy as anyone else in his position would be when their car finally stopped rolling._

_He was, however, surprised, his face lighting up in an outstanding shade of hot pink, when he realised that he had ended up cushioning the racer girl who lay, still unconscious, on him. It was a little upsetting though that his car was ruined and totalled to an unacceptable state. The fact that the wheels were facing the sky, signalling the trouble of getting it back into the position cars were supposed to be in 24/7 was even more depressing for the raven-haired assassin._

_He and the girl were trapped within the passenger area of the car under the heavy-duty engine designed for speed, and Allen knew better to get them out quickly, putting the welfare of the girl in his arms before his own safety._

_As the moment of bliss faded, Allen finally realised the pain ebbing in his side where a large shard of glass had jabbed him, tearing through the tender flesh that covered his bones. _

_After looking at his wound, the pain cut sharper into his flesh, sending several painful jabs to his nervous system and he let out a short cry of pain, and a groan or two, as he got up painfully from his position under the brown haired beauty._

_Mud splattered over his once well-groomed appearance, which he didn't really give a damn about. The thought that plagued his mind more than anything was the possibility of an infection spreading, invading through the wounds of the casualty in his arms, a normal worry for the victims of any type of accident most in the medical unit had._

_The young assassin struggled free, getting the girl out from under the car engine and out onto the cold, icy ground before pushing his way out from the car's passenger area. He pulled the glass shard painfully out of his side, which throbbed, and began wrapping the girl in another layer of his clothing until all he was left with was the undershirt he had put on under the sleeveless outfit. _

_Lifting the girl lightly, he looked around for any sign of danger before positioning her in a piggy-back position on his broad shoulders and began to move forwards, only a slight limp in his stride, despite the blood gushing out of the grave flesh wound in his side._

-

Allen rubbed his temples with his bloodied hands. Feeling the rough texture on his fingers, he realised that he had actually smothered his temples with dried blood, dried though it may be, and quickly got up, cleaning the room as he made his way out.

After cleaning up, taking a shower and putting on some new comfortable clothing, Allen sat in the same couch, refreshed, his jet black hair sticking out in some places, still partly wet.

-

_Allen was grateful of the metallic black carbon fibre that covered the body of his Ferrari. Though he was a little upset about the shattered tinted glass windows of special quality, which would be hard to replace._

_As he overturned the car with an energy he didn't have a clue from where he had gotten, he gazed at the girl who lay propped up against a tree. He wiped the sweat off his brow, noticing the cold numb that engulfed his fingers. The word '_frostbite_' came to mind and Allen brushed the thought aside. Now wasn't the time to worry about such a thing, especially out in the biting cold like this. _

_After turning the car over and checking if the custom-made machine was well enough to run and not hurt anyone or make the system go haywire, giving the driver no control over the car, Allen set to put Akira into the seat next to him once again, the shard of glass that had been there previously dusted off, on the ground mixed and blended in with the dirty grey snow._

_He drove to his house, resupplying and fetching his other vehicle from the garage. He quietly placed the ruined Ferrari in the place of the Lamborghini in the garage. _

_Exhausted, he marched up the stairs to the main bedroom where he slept, the girl still unconscious in his arms, the gash in his side throbbed painfully and his left eye pulsed, sending chills across his whole face and a sharp pain to his brain. His scarred left arm throbbed curiously and Allen just hoped the girl in his arms hadn't felt the blood rushing in his veins under the blood red skin._

_Treating Leo took not much longer than Allen had expected and he was done sewing up the dangerously deep cuts and bad bruises in no time, cleaning and dressing them in fresh new bandages as he went. As the girl slept peacefully, Allen stayed up, caring for the girl, attaching an IV at the side of the bed where the transparent liquid in it made its way into her blood stream._

_He realised the immobility of her legs when examining her physical condition and felt the disconnected nerves in them. He decided to ask Doctor Russell about it went he headed there the next day.

* * *

_

A/N: Okay. here's the next chapter. :) I had to repost it because I forgot to change something, so.

Review?


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